Monthly Archives: April, 2012

Secret shopper

I think I’d like to be a secret shopper.
Lots of such random thought going on here at the moment as I would like some financial independence (just some please) and still mind my monkeys . So far I’ve come up with Avon lady (I don’t wear
Makeup very much so probably a no go)
Cleaning product sales (I don’t clean so no)
Cake taster (this would work but I don’t see this advertised much)
Coffee taster (I do this, a lot. I pay)

Yes. As you can see I’m not getting far. I think I might start to review the places I drink coffee…..hmmmmmm. Hence my secret shopper thoughts. I’d still have to pay though. Hubby darling wouldn’t be too happy if I spent all the weeks grocery shopping on latte’s.
I’m still thinking…..

Polar bears are blue

That’s what I have been informed of this morning! We are very into colours at the moment.
“mummy, you know at nursery?, you know the door that’s blue on one side, the side for sitting, and white on the other side, the side for waiting , and there is a red door before that, that is red in the side not for sitting too, is that one after the green door?”
Oh dear, I really will have to pay more attention.
Littlest squiggle is on the move. All day today and yesterday afternoon we have had elevation on the posterior! Time to hide my stuff all over again. It’s a very exiting time, but also total mayhem about to kick in.
And a tooth, poking out now, her first, and she is letting us all know. This morning she grabbed her breakfast spoon of weetabix, gave it a sideways glance before discarding it on the deep pile rug with a look of complete disgust. Oh, now how dare we present her with breakfast when she is in this frame of mind.
The rain is not helping. It is making the kids fractious and bored and it’s making me eat biscuits! Come on summer, we need you now.

Super-glue

You know it’s going to be a good day with a 3 year superhero old bursts into your room at 7 in the morning, (after you’ve probably only been asleep for an hour) and shouts “watch out everyone, I’m superglue”!
We have had a topsy turvy year with our little man since his sister was born. That’s putting it very politely indeed. I have been known to phone my husband and ask him if it’s almost home time yet and it’s actually only lunchtime, such is my distress and terror about what he will throw my way next.
The huge saving grace though, about my wonderful little delinquent is his emerging language. He really has me cracking up in a regular basis. Yesterday he asked me what was wrong with my poor old head. Today I heard him encouraging his sister ….”dood dirl, you can do it, open up…” at which point I spun around, just in time to save the squiggle from a dessert spoon of self raising flour.
At dinner this evening he launched into a big long story about the fire drill at nursery and the fact that they will be setting up a little “catapillow” farm in his classroom. He told us the whole catapillow to butterfly process in surprisingly grown up detail.
It’s just amazing. He has gone from stringing words together , literally just a line of words, to someone with their own style and tone .
He is 3 going on 83 with his “oh I’m afraid I can’t have broccoli mummy, you see my tummy dust can’t be bothered” or “oh dear Deary me, I don’t want that story daddy”. Just priceless. We try so so hard not to laugh as its serious stuff, being 3 but sometimes the quaking with laughter does escape.
We also have to be very careful with what we say. I can’t go to the doctors surgery anymore after he told the receptionist that she didn’t look very much like a cow even though that’s what his mummy said.
Not to mention what he has told my poor MIL. Eeek
My favourite though is car language. It’s the absolute worst but also the funniest. My husband is what you might call an angry driver. One day, after a particularly trying ikea session we were heading home and some poor driver hesitated for a second on the roundabout. Dear old hubby seems to have forgotten our almost 3year old perched in the back soaking up whatever comes his way because he shouts “come on you pussy” to the driver in front. Silence ensues throughout the car. I glanced at hubby, who it has suddenly dawned on what he has done and we both look forward again hoping this outburst went un-noticed. And we thought it had until 5 minutes down the road a little shout from the back “tum on you puddy tat”. We were both silently laughing so much we had tears running down our faces. (going with the ignore it tactic, hoping it goes away fast). He has delighted with himself. Kept it up for a good 2 weeks after that. I drove around our neighbour hood with the windows tightly shut for quite some time in case any yummy mummy heard my little toddlers road rage….oops.
That’s Mother nature for you. She gives you a very trying terrible two/threenager who can reduce you to tears in an instant, then she makes you laugh so hard it hurts. Brilliant.

The perfect coffee

After the school run today I found myself meandering home on a bit of a long way ’round.
Ah ha! That’s me pretending I’m not going for a coffee and then, oh look, while we’re here lets get a coffee….
I always seem to start this kind of thing as a kind of chore-avoidance-tactic. And there were plenty of reasons not to be sneaking off for a latte. Baby in sling was first reason. She hasn’t had her first feed yet. Usual rush out the door and the excitement of a mobilising family is just too exiting to be bothering about milk. Also I’m dragging my firstborn’s transport home with me, no easy feat. I keep banging my shins with it. And lastly it’s raining.
So why am I really propelling myself the very long way home? Is the coffee that good? Well, I got my comeuppance. Forgot my wallet.
Not to worry, my homemade latte wasn’t too bad, and it was much cheaper.
And tomorrow I’ll think of a good reason why I have to go for a latte.